Quotes
“How you start your day is how you live your day. How you live your day is how you live your life.”— Louise Hay.
"The eyes are the windows to the soul" - Anonymous.
"When you need to learn quickly, learn from others. When you need to learn deeply, learn from experience." - James Clear.
"Always have an attitude of gratitude." - Sterling K. Brown
"Gratitude is riches. Complaint is poverty." - Doris Day.
"The quicker you apply - the quicker you fly" - Teronie J. Donaldson (Yep, that's me, cool, right?)
Notes/Observations
The images you send about yourself into the world determine how others see you. These images are created first in your mind, and then you act them out.
Your mind is one of the most potent forces on Earth. It can be your strongest ally or your worst enemy. To change your inner script, you must put energy and creativity into picturing success in being an assertive person.
Articles
Watched
Book of the week
The One Sentence Persuasion Course - 27 Words to Make the World Do Your Bidding by Blair Warren
"People will do anything for those who encourage their dreams, justify their failures, allay their fears, confirm their suspicions, and help them throw rocks at their enemies."
The book is a bit more nuanced than that, but this is the ultimate takeaway.
Strategy
Visualizing
The first way to change your inner script is to visualize, which is creating images in your mind as if what you imagine is already happening and coupling these images with the emotional desire to make it happen. Regular visualization practice will enable you to reproduce the pictures as real-life results.
There are two parts of visualization: creating a vivid picture of what you want and strongly feeling the desire to become assertive.
Choose the Time
Set aside about 15 - 20 minutes to visualize. It is better not to do visualization at the end of the day when you are tired and may go to sleep. Choose a time when you can give it your full attention: first thing in the morning, during your lunch hour, or in the evening well before bedtime. Sit or lie in a quiet place where you will not be disturbed. If you are sitting, uncross your arms and legs and lay your hands on your thighs. If you are lying down, lie on your back with your hands at your sides. In either case, make sure your neck and shoulders are relaxed.
Breathe
Once you are comfortable, breathe in and out gently. You can follow your breath to relax, or you can deliberately tell your body to relax. If it helps, you can tense and then relax the muscles in each part of your body for a few seconds, beginning with your face and ending with your feet.
Remember and imagine
You can also relax by bringing to mind your favorite scene: the ocean at the beach, a meadow with green grass, or a mountaintop. Remember how it felt the last time you were in such a place (by running your fingers through the sand or crunching through the snow), or imagine how it would feel if you were there. See yourself as calm, tranquil, and fulfilled. Feel the confidence of being peaceful.
Create a picture of yourself,
When you are relaxed, create a vivid picture in your mind of how you would look as assertive. Create the picture of being assertive that you want. Visualize a setting and people with whom you want to be more assertive. See the colors of the surroundings and the clothes you each have on. Hear the sounds and sense the smells of the surroundings. See and hear yourself saying assertive sentences starting with "I think," "I feel," and "I want." Hear the clear, strong, steady tone of voice you are using. Hear the confident thoughts you are thinking to yourself. Visualize yourself standing in an assertive manner, comfortably but firmly balanced on both feet, with your hands held loosely at your side. See yourself looking the other person straight in the eye.
Add energy
When your car has a dead battery, it is going nowhere until you energize that battery with a charge. Likewise, once you have brought a clear picture into your mind of acting and speaking assertively, the next step is to create as much positive, excited energy as possible. One of the best ways to do this is to answer why you want to be assertive. As you think about all the reasons you want to be assertive, you become more passionate about your feelings.
You may have to repeatedly ask yourself why you want to be assertive. Feel yourself successfully being assertive, very happy, and satisfied with what you have done. Visualize it and feel it as though it has already happened. Stay with the feeling as long as you can. You will sense these highly positive feelings in your solar plexus above your abdomen or in your heart.
Create a symbol
Another way to assist your visualization is to see a symbol of yourself being assertive. Imagine your symbol changing color, texture, and size then growing, expanding, and becoming more powerful. Then take this symbol into your hands and draw it close to your heart. See how being assertive will help you and others.
from Get Assertive! course by Vivian Harte (Gale Courses)
Question
In what ways are you being assertive in obtaining your goals?